i jus woke up n suddenly feel like writing. lol! im on msn with ciintaa now.
he nvr go sch..haiyoh!!! he uhh. da la this year n level.. niwaez...im so stress dunno wat to wear for interview later..wahpianggg... after iterview also dunno wan to go where.
sian leyy..walau!!!
yakkkdushhh!!!!
hey der...im bk! woke up early todae,went to church..yawwnn!!! hee..after that went makan.
was so fucked up with my ezlink. it was running low la n the POSB deduct $2 oredi.
so cant topup my card. imagine dat..in e end i took the free shuttle bus to sembawang
to my mum's place..went to see my grandma. ya...left there bout 6.
plan was to mit shawna n lepakk at sembawang. but meiling ask us go AMK last min.
so we went lorr.. hee! she was lookin for a pram for ika. but couldnt gt the cheap 1.
all so damm expensive da. haiyoh! so i was at AMk with rurul, shawna, ika n ling.
went to walk all round of AMK central jus to fing the pram shop haha!!! tiring or watt.
but nehmind, exercise org kate.. hahakz!! after that cannt get any, we went to AMK hub.
had our dinner at FOODFARE. rurul had this japanese food while me shawna n ling share 1 plate
of carrot cake. how pathetic is dat.. hahakz! niwae we dun feel like eatin much.
so yar... at the same time we waited for chantelle. she was after werk. she came
with greg... ohhh!den she sae she wan to mamam so they ate at S11...
after that we left for home. greg drove so chantelle n shawna wen bk with hym.
me,ling n rurul took e train.. rurul drop at khatib..ater he drop, i was carryin ika.
n guess wat?!!! no one gave up sits. can u just imagine this fuckin sporeans!!! goshh!!! i have to carry her all the way till woodlnads. hahkz! but shes so0o cute la. haiyoh!!!! kuchi2..haha!
n now im bk home..thinkin bout so many things. ohh ya, m havin interview tomo at suntec gelare.. hopefully i get.. dayah is accompanyin me. hee! i miss her seii.
so long nvr see her.. hmm, thats it for nw.. gt bk to u soon.. chows!
its 11.13pm now..n im in e room in e dark. doin ntg..wadoohhh!!!!
the whole day ive been at home doin ntg. mon i gt interview at ORCHARD CENTRAL.
hopefully dapatt la seii. i need money to pay alot of things.
die!die!die! hmm,suppose to go town with meiling bt die tk jadi la.
forever la she!hmph! today i disturb my sister alot sei.
till she bingitt wit me liou! haha!!! nobody to disturb la. cant possibly disturb
my dad ritee...hah!! world war terozz..for that also she scold me. :(
sobz2...haha!!! tomorw mrg must wake up early go church summore. wahh paiangggg!!!!
bo tahan liou lor. but, bopian mahh.. jus nw i camwhore from my sister hp, took some pics of my nails but cannt bluetooth to this lappy. fuck rite.... well, just waiting
for my father to slip den i g smoke. cannt tahan la. gtg for nw.
chow pple!!!!
hey der... its a sat n im at home. damm...
my sisterf jus came bk from chalet this mrg n shes sleepin nw.
my bro n father went cozway point dunno do wat.
can u imagine hw bored am i nw...just sittin at hm n watchin tv.
gosshh!!! plz!! ive nvr been dus bored before. bein sgl boring, attch also boring.
my lyfe damm bored da nw.
my fren coming over my hse with her kidss.haiyoh!!
stressnesss!!!!! btw, i had my nails done. heee!!! but 1 broke.
fuck up!!! my lips stil abit swell up..
n ya, i talked to ciintaa otf yest jus for awhile. i broke my promise
to maself.. arrgh!!!! dammit!!
well, gtg nw..these r some pics i took. boredomm!!!
chow!! :)
021208 - 030110i think me n ciintaa has reali ended! he ask me to move on. thats all i hv to say. :'(
if ure saying bout gals breakin ur heart ciintaa... u believe in karma dun u. ni aru sikit tau. u hv to accept the fact that ure once breakin alot of gals heart... i broke up with u for a reason. didnt xpect us to b worst than this.to make u realise wat ure doin. u see, we both cant let each other go. bt we r stil delaying. one of us has to put our feet dwn on e ground n stand firm of wat we want. if not this thing will nvr end. stil with e quarrels,etc... i also duno wat fuck shitt is goin on bhind ma back.. understand u in whatt? hmm.... i duno hw u wan me to understand u anymore...
im soo fucked up nw!!! i jus had my lips pierced yest..hee!!! nw swollen. u know wat, i miss ciintaa alott!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! bt i jus cant seem to gt her off my mind. we hv done so many things whch we nvr done n nw its hard to let go. maybe it takes time.. bt i cant possiby go n den cm bk again. its been happening for the past 4 yrs. we kip goin awae n than coming bk together again. im sick n tired of this crap! seriously...arrgh!!!!!!!!!!!!
hhakz...be with me also stess, nt with me also stress. bth also u nvr cncentrate on ur studies. nw u askin me to move on?? i bet u beter think twice.. dun owas gv pple hope n den take bk ur werds. ya ure damm hurtin me too much... kip that in mind coz im waiting for karma! fuckin idiot!i hate pple giving me hope! u nd sum1 to b beside u w/o any prbs..ya, go ahead. only stopid gals will be like so into u like i use to last time..ure makin me so pissed dat i feel like slappin u nw!!!!!
I loved you more than I have ever knownThose starry eyes
Those tender lips
You made my heart melt
Then boil into a roaring fire
I now know
What my eyes could not see
You are the only one that is for me
Many nights those tears flew
Being myself without anyone
Anyone to care about the thoughts
Looking at the sky and knowing
Many mistakes I had
Many mistakes I have had
Time Clicks as I await
The hour ends before my take
Sitting, thinking, waiting; my mind escapes
The day grows old as night passes
Wolves crying, coyotes howling; anticipating
Watching, staring, seeing -- nothing
Silence begins the day
as morning comes without notice
Tears begin to fall, slowly
The day moves on without hope
Wishing to be what is not to be
The sun moves to its peak
without a whisper or retreat
Time moving, but still empty
Stomach aching, curling
Still waiting
good mrg evry1... im jus bored again. ciintaa didnt go sch. he sae he was werkin flyers in e mrg...so ya..hmm, im jus waiting for his call/msg. as he say he wan to go out makan. waiting lor!! will c. well, i know ciintaa too well as said. sori didnt write to u yest. As my bro was using the lappy to see some iritatin show. like duhh!!!! as for now, im gona get ready n go for interview. will write to u in e nite if i have the chance okey.. tc! peace :D
hello peeps....
im lyin dwn on my bed..typing,chatin on msn with ciintaa.
hmm, mrg woke up..went to church, interview at e central...far sia.
hopefully i gt the job la.den after that i rush to hosp.see shawna..
she look so sad la..she wanan go hm bt she cant.poor gal da..
bt wat to do...after that torn n adie came.den we left at bout 10+..
nw tired...goin to sleep in while.kk...nites2..
its like 2.50am nw... i jus came bk frm hospital like an hr ago.. went to visit shawna..with torn,ciintaa,brenda... hmm, hope she will gt well so0n. borin sia like dat stay hospital. n u know wat, ciintaa n i had some time to talk while ciintaa havin his ice-kachang.hahha!!!! ciintaa kip askin me wat r we nw. i reali dunno hw to ans to that quest.. all i cn sae is, i still feel e same thing for him as last time bt our status is a question mark to evry1..evn me! n wen i ask him who kips toppin up his card, he sae his ex's. ohh gossh!!!!!!!!!!!!! hw does dat feels???? can sum1 tell me plz! thou we r ntg..bt it still feels a thing at least. can sum1 plz slap me r maybe ciintaa...i nd to wakeup frm my love storybook la!!! wtf am i thinking!! dun be stoopid plz.arrgh!!!!!!!!!!! fuck it for nw la.
i was so pissed early today in e evening. ciintaa asked me if i wana mit n i sae ok..he sae @ 530 but at 545 like ciintaa msg me sayin "haha! kene teman ibu g byr kereta.jumpa bsk jela kae. u take me from sch" tak sott per akuu..fuuhhh!!!! sabar org kate yer. hmm, i cant be bothered much la..can u imagine hw bored am i rite now..hahakz! feel like dying. tomo wan to go find werk bt ciintaa wants me to take him frm sch...so i duno la..we r actuali quarellin nw so ya..i duno la! i miss u ciintaa....hope to see u so0n aitez.
hey der..:)
i went for interview at IMM.hopefully i get it.btw, i met up with siti n boyfie...went over to their place.
its been along time since i met her. im so happi for her that she found sum1 in her life. :) hope they will last.
my hart aches wen i see em so0 loving2..well, how i wish ciintaa was der with me.but too bad..ciintaa's sick at home.
ciintaa owas gettin sick...haish! worries me. kk, sto talkin bout ciintaa now okie.u know watt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
im so happi that i gotten over my cash debts..fo0o0o!!!! i had to go thru thinkin if i culd stil apply for line.
and yes, i did... jus to gt the phone i had to open up a new line under singtel jus to pay off my debts.n yes,i did it!
but nw the headache part is i have to find a job ASAP to pay up for e next 2yrs. walau!!!!!!!!!!stress!!!!!
i duno how to tell my father la seii...shitt! confrm gona get a hell of a scolding.hahakz! ahhhhhh..
but i did it coz i have to....i dun wana get my fam involve as it was my wrong doins.so yar...
well, dats it for now.... will be back tomorow okie peepz...takin care. nites outt.. :D
im stress thinkin bout cash debts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i can go bonkers thinkin but it. i swearr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! wat a thing to do. n i have learn ma mistakes... ciintaa, how i wish u were stil mine to go thru this with me. i know u dun seem to care coz i dun belong to u anymore. but at least shw me that u care. haish!!! im speechless when u tell out ur feelins yest to me.i just cant believe ciintaa doin all dat jus coz hes geramm with me. like i say, im jus disappointed in ciintaa for makin that kind of decision jus to prove me that he can be better off w/o me. infact we know we both need each other. thats y we r still seein each other..if not i dun think i'll b even miting ciintaa r wana see hes face at all. i hope ciintaa will change for the better.im prayin n hopin for the best netween me n ciintaa.... :)
hey peepz.... ciintaa didnt wen school todae.he came over ma place n ya...:) i dunno la wats happening. i feel so weird at times. evrydae fighting. evn not together also fighting.dunno la how. todays its torn pit pit bdae.. da 18 seii dia.shawna celebratin with their frens at sch all. than xpect me to cm dwn.crazy! than at nite cnfrm bby all coming dwn. i dun wana see their face. dala yest bby pick a fite with me. crazy! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh............................. fuck all this shitt man!
im back from civic with shawna,torn n ciintaa. i didnt xpect ciintaa to b around.yes, he did call me earlier bt i didnt thot he will tag along.hmmm! we acted like normal,i jus dunno y he must guh or evn kiss me. im like jus goin with the flow. it hurts me wen ciintaa treat me like dat. i duno how to face evry1 n evn ciintaa!!!i duno where am i heading to. alot has been happenin in ma lyfe. i tell ciintaa, bt i dunno if ciinta reali care. evn if u dun its okie with me, i know where i stand. so, its ok.. im gettin use to it ciintaa.if u were to read this, hope u understand.
Now im lyin on ma bed thinking of something realli stoopid. im infact missing all my yshun BABES! bt due to some reasons i had to be on my own for a while. as for e rest i noe it will b ok in time but as for nana(my only daughter),she has e temper in her.which im giving her time to cool down bt it dun seems like shes cooling down.im scared to make e 1st move coz wat if she rejects me. it will a waste n shameful thing.. my mouth was e biggest mistake ever..ahhh, u know wat. leave it la...time will come to tell. i gt better things to do niwae. so ya...peace. :) i'll stop here for nw. cant think of anything to write.
gdnite!!!!!
